Some people enjoy having more than one place to call home. They like having two places to chill or keep their stuff or sleep. Makes me realize why I feel the way I do when I think about having my stuff divided between places. And why I dislike staying at peoples houses for long periods of time. It makes me cringe just remembering having my life in 2 or more different places. I'm so grateful to be in one place now and that I realize how good I have it. And I'm thankful for all the people who gave me a place to keep part of my life in. I may not have appreciated it then, but I sure as hell do now.
I'm not saying my life sucked or anything, although teenage Ayla definitely thought so at times. I've just figured a tiny piece of myself out! It triggers some crazy stress hormones when I remember having my stuff all over the place and when I imagine it happening again for any number of reasons. I'm so glad I have all my stuff in one place, even if our apartment is a little cramped.
It's all about perspective. One person's heaven is another's hell. I'm fascinated by instances such as these, when I discover something apparently so crucial to my being that I didn't even have the eyes to see it for myself-- I had to discover it. Listen to me, I sound like I'm discovering a new land or a planet or something. But that's kind of what it feels like. Its one more piece of my own personal universe puzzle. How cool is that?
Read, write, live.
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